Always Sure Something Bad is Going to Happen? Here’s Why
Dr. Sheri Jacobson
March 14, 2023
By: JD Hancock
by Andrea M. Darcy
We all sometimes worry that something bad is going to happen. And the reality is that sometimes things DO go wrong. Life is far from perfect.
But is your head full of worried thoughts all the time? And do you spend most days (if not all) stressed that something bad will happen to you, your loved ones, or to the world?
Then it’s less likely less about any real danger, and more about issues with your thinking.
[Worried to the point you just can’t function? Talk to our therapists and counsellors from anywhere in the world via online and phone using our new platform, harleytherapy.com.]
Why you are sure something bad is around the corner
See if one or several of the below psychological issues might be behind your feeling that something bad is going to happen.
1. Sleep Problems.
Basics first. If you have sleep problems, you can start to have paranoia and anxiety, simply as your brain is exhausted and can’t cope. If you don’t get help with sleep problems, it can lead to depression.
2. Substance Abuse.
Start being honest with yourself if your drinking is out of hand, or you are indulging in too many party drugs. These both contribute to poor sleep and exhaustion and work as depressants, both of which can leave you paranoid and on edge.
3. Stress.
By: Sodanie Chea
The brain does not seem to have evolved as fast as society has. It can react to modern life stress the same as it once would to being attacked by a leopard. Namely it triggers the ‘fight or flight’ mode.
The rush of cortisol and other hormones this creates puts us on red alert, scanning for further danger.
4. Cognitive Distortions.
‘Cognitive distortions‘ are when, without even realising it, our mind warps reality. Some examples are black and white thinking, doom and gloom thoughts, and fortune-telling.
Why would you have a distorted way of seeing the world? You might have been bought up by parents who modelled this way of thinking. Or something happened to you as child that taught your brain to operate like this (see childhood trauma, below).
5. Anxiety about something bad happening.
Anxiety involves unrealistic and uncontrollable racing thoughts that affect us physically, leaving us breathless, sweating, and with a racing heart. Paranoia and a certainty that something bad is going to happen is par for the course here.
How do you end up with anxiety? It can start as stress. Over time and left unchecked, stress can turn into anxiety or anxiety disorder.
Anxiety can also be triggered by trauma. This can be recent, like an accident or shock bereavement. Or it can be from childhood.
6. Negative Core Beliefs.
If you can honestly say you’ve spent most of your adult life with a feeling something bad will happen, you might have a core belief that the world is not safe.
Core beliefs are assumptions we make about ourselves, others, and the world that we then mistake for fact. Usually formed in childhood, core beliefs then secretly drive all our choices in life.
By: Kevin Dooley
Childhood trauma, or even just having a parent who was unreliable, can lead to the formation of a belief that the world is always dangerous.
7. Childhood Trauma.
Sadly, at least one in four of us live through difficult and threatening experiences as children. And our childhood brains then simply decide the world is dangerous. If we aren’t offered help, or don’t seek help for our childhood trauma as adults, that belief can dictate all our choices.
8. Personality Disorders.
Some of us just experience the world in a different manner than the average person.
Personality disorders mean that since early adulthood, you have consistently thought and acted differently to others in ways that make daily life a challenge.
And in the case of some personality disorders, this can mean you sense danger where others don’t.
Paranoid personality disorder leaves you thinking people are out to get you, and that bad people are controlling the world.
Schizotypal personality disorder can mean you see danger in strange ways, such as the TV talking to you.
Avoidant personality disorder would see you thinking others will hurt you, and borderline personality disorder means you are so oversensitive you overreact, feeling threatened by something small.
I can’t stop feeling something bad will happen
Do you spend your life in fear of what bad thing will happen next? Feel completely unable to stop thinking this way? Do consider reaching out for professional support.
A professional counsellor, counselling psychologist, or psychotherapist can help you get to the root of your core belief that the world is a dangerous place. You can find new ways to cope that mean you feel more comfortable around others and in daily life.
Need to talk to someone about your fear that something bad is going to happen? We connect you with some of London’s top therapists in central locations. Not in London? Visit our sister site harleytherapy.com to find therapists across the UK.
Andrea M. Darcy is the founding editor and lead writer of this site, who left a career as a screenwriter to become a popular mental health writer. She herself had to get over the belief that the world was dangerous, and it made a huge difference to her life.
I have feeling something not good will happen everytime
Hi Sadio, we are sorry to hear that. We hope the article helps.
I need a serious help. I always think that if certain things aren’t done a certain way this or that isn’t ever going to happen (For example : if i avoid this speed breaker i’m going to pass my semester otherwise i’m fail). Pls help
Hi there, we don’t know you and obviously we can’t diagnose someone we don’t know, let alone over a comment box! But we’d suggest you look into anxiety and also obsessive compulsive disorder, and from there seek some counselling. CBT therapy would be a great start, it’s a short-term therapy that helps you get control of negative thoughts. Good luck!
Things are going good in my life right now but I can’t shake the feeling that’s my something is going to happen something horrible and I’m in the car about to break down because I have a bad feeling that I can’t shake.
Hi Jennifer, sometimes if we have a deep rooted limiting belief from childhood that we don’t deserve good things, then when life goes good we can panic and find ways to block it.Find proof in your life of times that things went good and nothing bad happened. And come up with ten reasons you deserve good things in your life. These kinds of tactics can help calm the brain. But if it’s actually anxiety, which is largely a physical response, heart beating, sweating, upset stomach? It could be that at some point in your childhood something bad happened when you were happy that has given you an idea good things lead to danger. All of this can be sorted with therapy, we’d highly suggest CBT which essentially retrains the brain away from dramatic thinking.
Okay basically if I do or don’t do a certain thing something bad will happen ‘if I don’t eat that then my mom will die but if I do eat it my dad will’ or like really small things if I don’t touch this a certain amount of times then I will fail my exams and uh it’s just really annoying because I know it’s not true but I still believe it.
Hi Sam, that sounds like some serious anxiety, and in fact it might also be the beginning of obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). Well worth going and talking to a professional about now when it’s still just, as you say, ‘annoying’. You might also want to look into CBT therapy, it’s short term and you don’t have to talk much about the past, but it really helps to retrain your brain away from negative thought traps. In summary, we’d imagine you are under considerable amount of stress and your brain is trying to cope. But if you are having this sorts of thoughts, sounds like you need some support.
Everyday it’s getting worse and I hate thinking because when I like think and do stuff I normally do I can’t like not do it like my brain or my mind or whatever is making me do it by blackmailing me ‘if you eat then ur sister will get seriously ill’ I just hate it so much like I just hate it so much
Sam, please do talk to someone about it. Either a school counsellor, an adult you trust, or even your parents. We have an article on how to talk to your parents about mental health http://bit.ly/talktoparents there are also free helplines you can call if you are in the UK http://bit.ly/mentalhelplines. There will be help lines in other Western countries too, you just have to google and find them. They are worth calling.
Am constantly worrying always what other people say about me even if there not talking about me I feel they are.. I worry so much that bad things will happen to my kids before things even happen I feel guilty for everything I decided. When I no i shouldn’t but I cant help it but everything hits me a lot at night time just be before bed.. its prob my own fault as a single mum of to obz been a bit stress thought out and working to support my children
Hi Anna, sounds like you are under a tremendous amount of stress, dealing with a lot all by yourself, and are suffering with anxiety. Anxiety often hits when we try to sleep. Is there someone you can talk to that you trust? Otherwise, are there any support groups for single moms in your area? Sometimes it can be a great relief just to talk to others who understand what we are dealing with.
I’ve been having a bad feeling that someone i know will be in danger but i only know of them online and it’s eatin me up because anytime i’m in deep thought the person goes into my head all bloody or in really bad shape
Hi Kim, we don’t know you enough to really comment on this, but if you often get this happening it’s a good chance it’s anxiety related. Worth talking to a counsellor about.
I feel I have a mild issue but I am looking how to change my way of thinking because I am tired of the thoughts. My thoughts are actually turning me into a recluse and I force myself into going our and acting like I am having fun to avoid conflict with others. I stress about upcoming activities or events that are even planned out. My thought is “if I go out with my spouse/others and have too much fun something bad will happen.” fear that it might lead to fighting, disagreements or even the law being called. This type of thing has rarely occurred in my life, but yet it has in a few different ways and now I cant stop thinking that it will repeat itself. This has really put a strain on my marriage and other areas. I want to rid myself of this thinking so I can enjoy the good things in life again. I used to be so laid back, but now that has seemed to change.
Gee, this sounds like anxiety. We’d highly recommend cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) which is a short term therapy of generally up to four months that focuses exactly on helping you gain control of negative thought patterns. It’s very effective, studies show it’s efficacy, and you don’t even have to talk much about your past, it focuses on the present.
Whenever things are going great in my relationship, I feel like its too good to be true and my subconscious looks for anything that might be bad, ex. He could be cheating on me, hes lying to me, etc. And when I ask him, to ease my mind, it makes him frustrated and thus makes our relationship not as good for a while.
Hi Hallie, it’s a familiar pattern for many. When we doubt people, they feel hurt. Often who we need to trust is ourselves. Do you trust yourself to pick a good partner? Do you even trust that you deserve one? There’s a few things we’d recommend here. One, a daily gratitude practise http://bit.ly/gratitudepractise. It train your mind to see what is working, not just what is going wrong. Second, communication. Often when we are feeling nervous or insecure it’s the way we communicate that gets us into trouble. Instead of sharing that we feel insecure, we attack and blame. So we need to learn to communicate in ways that attract, not repel, love https://www.harleytherapy.co.uk/counselling/communication-skills-attract-love.htm . Finally, consider CBT therapy. It’s a short-term therapy that focuses on the present, not the past, and is designed to help you gain control of your negative thought patterns, stopping them before they lead to actions you then regret http://bit.ly/CBTTherapy
Everything single day I think about death to the point where I can’t enjoy simple activities. I realized today it’s really bad because I went to six flags with my boyfriend and I constantly kept thinking I was going to fall out the roller coaster or my seat was going to break and I was going to die or be in critical condition. Everyday most of the day I think about dying like one day I’m going to be dead and it’s nothing I can do about it. It freaks me out so bad I start panicking and start crying. I always fear that something is going to happen to my son. Like while someone else is watching him but I never use to think so harsh. I just see horrible images in my thoughts of horrible car accidents and imagining if I die or someone I love dies how hard it would affect me. I know it’s normal to think about it here and there but I think about it everyday multiple times a day. I had to leave the park bc I was scared someone was going to start shooting or something was going to happen on a ride I got on. I’m so tired of thinking about horrible things. Like I was at Walmart and rushed to get in the car after leaving in fear someone was about to shoot up the Walmart parking lot. I’m terrified i don’t know what to do. Sometimes I wish I could just stay in the house forever.
Hi Sharon, we obviously don’t know you well enough to diagnose and certainly can’t diagnose based on a comment, but there is a very good chance you’d be diagnosed with anxiety disorder, where fearful thoughts have taken on enough power they determine how you live your daily life. We can be born more prone to anxiety than others, and either unmanaged or processed difficult childhood events lead to us being an anxious adult, often exacerbated by the stress of having children, or we experience trauma as an adult that leaves us with anxiety. In either case, it sounds like it’s time for help as this level of anxiety is not going to go away by itself. You can try self help as a start, learning about anxiety and perhaps teaching yourself mindfulness http://bit.ly/mindfulnessallabout. But ideally you would seek some counselling. It seems you are in America, or we’d suggest you see your family doctor, as in the UK there is free counselling. If you have an insurance that could cover any therapy, we’d suggest CBT as a good start, it’s short term and focuses not on your past but on turning negative thoughts to more balanced ones. If you are on a low budget read our article on finding low cost therapy here for inspiration http://bit.ly/lowcosttherapy. All the best.
I think I have anxiety but I don’t know but I definitely had a panic attack more than twice but my thoughts and feeling have gotten to a point where i can’t enjoy anything anymore and the feeling is just so surreal(i have a problem with death I’m terrified of it but I wasn’t like that a few years ago it’s new) so I always have a feeling that I’m going to die which scares me a lot but my main problem is I’m really attached to my mum and I’m always scared to loose her (I’m terrified that she might die and I’m still young I’m 19) it has gotten to a whole new level:
-sleepless nights
-fast heart rate and difficulty breathing
-feeling like I’m about to loose my mind or loose control of my self
I was always scared that something bad might happen to my mum while I’m away from her (like being at schl or University freaks me out) but for a while now like a month or two I have been having these thoughts and feelings that she’s going to die and it has me hysterically Crying, my stomach hurts to the point where I feel like I’m going to throw up, and I feel like something happens to her I would die my life is pointless without her(my mum has helped me thru so much especially rlly bad verbal and physical bullying) I have talked to her about my feeling sometimes I calm down talking about them but other times nothing, and have told her I would like to see a psychologist.
Is it anxiety? And if it is, is there anywhere that can help me get in touch with someone near me?
Please I beg for your help
(By the way I’m very shaken and having the worst thoughts and feelings about something to my mum so please excuse me)
Also these feelings and thoughts have stopped me from going out with friends and leaving the house is really hard because I feel like danger Is arounf
Hi Jenna, we can’t diagnose anyone over the internet we’re afraid, that would be very unprofessional of us. But it does sound like a form of extreme anxiety or anxiety disorder. Anxiety is driven by fear and fear of death is common. We just want to say good for you for telling your mother you would like to see a psychologist. How did that go? Is she going to help you find support? If not now that you are over aged 18 and an adult you can legally find a therapist yourself. All the best, HT.
Hello, i dont know if i have an anxiety disorder but there is no day that i couldnt think bad, like what if my parents die because of an accident and i dont want that to happen. I just couldnt control my mind so id just knock on the woods every damn time. Theres no exception. I am worriede everywhere and everytime, even at school during discussion or at house together with my parents and siblings, i kept on knocking the woods. I am getting paranoid. Please help me.
Hi Freya, it does sound like anxiety. We can’t diagnose over the internet, we’d need to know you personally and take a full history. So the best thing to do is to find some support. Is there a counsellor at school you could talk to about this?
Hello
I just have a few questions
I have been having anxiety for the past year and just like the story of jenna I sometimes am hysterical about loosing my mother (I’m 20)
My main problem is that recently I have been feeling that my mother is going to die but the feeling is not like anxiety, like a stressed stomach or a pounding heart.
I have been feeling calm about the idea for 2-3 days now (I live with my parents) so it’s triggering me because I’m scared it is my instinct and that something is actually going to happen to my mum.
I have been seeing a psychologist to help me so I don’t know if the calmness is coming from that.
My mum is healthy and doesn’t have problems, but I have always been scared to loose her(since I was a kid) ,but the calm feeling that she’s going to die is worrying me.
If you can please help me understand what this is, thank you in advance.
I can get sick but won’t take medicine prescription by doctor because I am afraid how it will make me feel so I stay sick it makes me so mad I’m this way. Also if I ask someone for something to drink I won’t drink it if they open it. Afraid they might of put something in it.
Hi Margie, sounds like you are really hard on yourself. There are a lot of people who don’t like medication and who suffer from some anxiety. Have you considered reaching out to a counsellor? It’s something that can definitely improve with support. CBT therapy in particular is something worth looking into.It’s short term, you don’t have to talk much about the past, and it helps you recognise and take charge of the thinking that is upsetting you.
Hi Zeina, it could still be anxiety. Sometimes when we get to a very advanced state of anxiety it can feel like numbness. As can depression. We’d advise you talk about this with your psychologist – great to hear you are working with one! As for something happening to your mum, this kind of thinking is called ‘fortune telling’ and it is considered a cognitive distortion, you might find our article on this useful. http://bit.ly/cognitivedistortionlist
Hi, every time its time for me to go to my boyfriends house i always think negative stuff that is the worst…there was a time i did go by him but my gut was saying don’t go and i went and i ended up in big trouble but their were an other time and it was the same but it was ok…nothing happen.
Hi Khalyma, sounds like anxiety. There are some of us who develop anxiety within relationships, because of the way we were parented as kids- read about this in our article on ‘anxious attachment’ http://bit.ly/anxiousattachment.
Sometimes I do worry that some specific negative things I imagine,will happen to me in the future kind of drive me crazy making it difficult for me to concentrate on my study.i am in the university now,and I sometimes think I will loss my parent in time to come,and these certainly frightening me,making it difficult for me to concentrate on my study,i certainly need help,because right now I defer my admission to later year,and I haven’t getting better.
Hi Peter, we can’t diagnose anyone without knowing them, certainly not based on a comment, but we’d say it’s a very good idea to have a chat to someone about this. It sounds like you might have anxiety. Many young people who have recently left home, if suffering anxiety, worry about their parents dying. Do you have access to counselling at all?
Hie. I got a serious problems. I have done so many things in my life. So sometimes i feel like am tied both my hands and my regs and people they are beating me to death. Or sometimes am thnking that i got electrocuted or got hit by car. Sometimes i may even thnk that i dont exits. Plz help me. What can this be.
Hi Leonard, we can’t really say based on a comment, it could be anxiety. But it’s definitely worth seeing someone over, as it sounds like your thoughts are really stressing you out and affecting your coping. Do you have access to counselling via your school or workplace? Would you be willing to talk to your GP or doctor? Or seek some counselling privately? You might want to look into CBT, cognitive behavioural therapy. It’s short term, you don’t have to talk much about your past, instead if focuses on helping you manage your thinking. Good luck!
It’s always when I’m in a car. I don’t drive not just because I haven’t got my license I’ve chosen not to. I’m scared of other drivers and it’s such a scary thing I go into panic mode and that’s all I do. I always feel like something bad will happen. Even if it doesn’t. I have the fear but nothing ever happened and it just seems 100% real. I get the shakes it’s so hard not to feel this way.
Hi Alisha, sounds tough. It’s possible this is connected to a greater anxiety or another traumatic experience, we can’t say without knowing you. Anxiety can mean we can obsess on one thing we perceive as dangerous, such as cars, being underground, crowds… each person has their own ‘thing’. If you feel very worried do consider talking to a professional about it.
I’m paranoid to the point I’m disabled that I’ll be a victim of revenge porn and be publically shamed and humiliated. These private photos/videos were made to help me with my OCD compulsions and have many. I’ve been diagnosed with many illnesses, PTSD being one. I’ve already been assaulted in more ways than one. Which made me lose trust not only in others but myself as well, hence having to rely on my camera. I don’t want to feel violated and lose even more of sense of self and worth. But I’m scared someone will upload it online and I’m identified.
Hi Meg, it sounds like this might actually also be an obsession. Is there any compulsive thinking that follows? Do you you go through any kind of checklist in your head, for example? Sometimes we can not realise it’s another form of OCD because the compulsion isn’t exterior, like arranging things or washing hands, but all interior/mental. In summary, this is serious and something to talk about with your therapist. Don’t feel embarrassed about it, therapists don’t at all judge and it won’t seem weird to them. You might find our article on “Primarily Obsessive OCD” interesting https://www.harleytherapy.co.uk/counselling/pure-o-pure-ocd.htm
I get this fear that I’m being investigated and the law is trying to get me I have 7 baths a day and I think about ending my life often I can’t live alone as I cannot manage being by myself it scares me I have been diagnosed adhd bipolar and schizophrenia I have type 1 diabetes and my health is poor I can’t find a medication that does not have severe side effects my whole life is a struggle last week I thought someone had a hit on me this is really shit thinking and I know I am delusional sometimes I’m 50 and these are the cards I’ve been dealt you can’t help me no one can
Hi Adam, it’s hard to hear how much you are suffering, but harder to hear that you have decided nobody can help you. There are many people with bipolar and schizophrenia who have been helped. So why are you a special case? We are also curious if you have just been given meds or if you are actually receiving proper support and counselling. As meds alone are not the answer you need support to help you find a sense of self worth again.
Hi,
I have a big problem, I feel like I am being watched when I am alone. I feel like someone is standing behind me. especially when there is a loud consistent sound like a hairdryer. I feel like something really bad is going to happen and I am not sure why or what. the only thing that helps is being around people and/or hearing music. I wanna get therapy and reach for help but I am underage, I am terrified about talking to someone about it and even the thought of it makes me burst into tears.
what should I do and whaat do you think is the problem?
Mia, we can’t really tell you what it is without knowing you and having a full history. There are many things it could be, from mild paranoia to PTSD, and would also be good to get a physical health check to rule out anything to do with hearing etc, it might simply be a medical issue over mental. We don’t think you should be scared to talk to someone about this. A counsellor or therapist won’t at all judge you nor will a doctor. If you are sure it’s nothing to do with your ears or sinuses, for example, what you might want to do is read our article on how to ask your parents for help getting mental health support http://bit.ly/talktoparents. Hope that helps.
I have been day dreaming about certain things but they seem to happen. I’m getting a little bit scared. Can you tell me what you think about this?
It can be a question of unconscious focus affecting decision making. The mind seeks to ‘prove’ it’s negative core beliefs true. For example, if you are sure on a deep level ‘you don’t deserve good things’, you will unconsciously make decisions to prove this true. You could meet two potential partners at the same time, one who is nice and one who is exciting but really quite obviously not a good choice. You would then convince yourself to dismiss the nice calm partner as, say, boring. But totally block out that the other person is evidently a poor choice, only to later say, “I don’t understand why bad things happen to me’. It becomes about facing up to how our own focus and choices are creating our lives. Best, HT
I feel that something bad is going to happen to me and I am going to die from a disease like cancer and my parents are going to die. Im scared and i constantly worry about it every day. I want someone to talk to because I don’t want to hold it in anymore and I hate thinking like this. Im 16, I know I have a long life ahead of me and I just want to be happy, but I can’t.
Hi Battalion, being a teenager is tough. Your brain is still growing, your body and brain are being flooded with hormones, and you are psychologically in the phase of trying to figure out who you are and what you will be. Many teenagers go through depression and anxiety as it can be overwhelming. And it’s actually not that unusual to have thoughts about your parents dying. As a teen you realise you will have to soon be independent, and this can result in panic about losing parents. As for ‘being happy’, the American idea that we are supposed to feel great all the time is not just highly unrealistic it’s highly unhelpful. Life is complicated and a learning curve. Sometimes we feel good, sometimes we don’t. We need our emotions like sadness and anger to know who we are and to set boundaries. Aiming to be falsely ‘feeling good’ all the time leads to mental health issues. So try to work to accept yourself as you are, to not judge yourself for having emotions and worries, for exploring your emotions and worries instead. What is this about? What can I learn about myself here? How can I practice self care? What do I want and need? As for support, does your school have a counsellor? They are there for a reason, and will be happy to talk to you. There are also free hotlines in Western countries that specialise in young people, find the UK list of free help lines here http://bit.ly/mentalhelplines. As you are under 18 you will need parental approval if you want to see a private therapist, we have an article on talking to your parents about mental health here http://bit.ly/talktoparents. Best, HT
I feel like if i have a fight with someone they will take it on their ego and put their whole life in making my life miserable i believe my younger brother who is a little dull in studies and is a trouble maker will make my life and my parents life a hell i am always worried about my parents i keep on thinking alternatively one bad thing over other bad thing i am just totally drained and depressed i went to a therapists but he was of no help….he just wanted to make money….i feel i am weak even though i do gym and all ….i believe people will gang up and bully me and i will be helpless its eating me please help i dont have anywhere to go
Hi Siddarth, here’s the thing. You do need support. And you went to a therapist, and you immediately decided he was not good and thought the worst of him. But if you already trust nobody and think everyone is out to get you, it’s only natural you’ll not trust a therapist at first. You have to be honest with a therapist trust is an issue for you, and you have to stick it out. Not all therapist is a perfect fit, but give a therapist at least four sessions before thinking the worst. Here’s our guide to finding a good therapist as well http://bit.ly/findgoodtherapist
So I was in incident a few years ago, one evening I was lying in bed then next thing I know I hear gun shots flying over my head and bullets through the walls, it was terrifying, it really screwed me up. That was the first and hopefully the last time that happens, I did finally moved past it.
But now I think that feeling or whatever happened has come back to me,
My problem I’m having recently is when the evening comes around midnight or so I get really overwhelmed I start to think that something terrible is going to happen! Even if I hear a thud or just noises from out side I instantly think someone’s going to break in or shoot at us. So I don’t know what else to do and it’s starting to make fell truly depressed. even my own husband just kinda ignores me when I get frightened or make him to look out side just to given me closure.
Hi Hayley, gosh how terrifying. That is a traumatic experience for anyone to go through. Have you looked at the symptoms of PTSD? If you look it up and it sounds familiar, you might want to consider finding an EMDR therapist. It’s a special technique that is very effective with one major trauma incident. Otherwise clinical hypnotherapy can help. Go easy on yourself, these kinds of experiences affect some of us long term if we don’t get help.
Hi I am 17 years old, I have always been somewhat happy in my life, I have never experienced any major childhood trauma but for the past few weeks, I have been getting disturbing thoughts, thoughts which are too graphic, too violent to share. For the past few weeks, I am getting thoughts like my brother is going to die in the next 10 years in an accident, something is going to happen to me, to my mom and dad if I don’t do a certain task. My mind messes me up like “touch the right side of the couch 10 times so that nothing will happen”, “pray atleast one hour to god so that everything is fine”, I feel like I have a bit of Paranoid personality disorder, Avoidant personality disorderand borderline personality disorder. I have also become highly superstitious In whatever I do, overreactive, I share my thoughts to my family but I am too scared I will hurt them and that they will feel embarressed that I have such negativ thoughts about their well being. I am doubtful that it could be my sleep, could you help me in this case, I am puzzled.
Hi there Aman, doesn’t sound at all like any of those personality disorders, but obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). Thoughts are just thoughts, they do not make you a bad person or a negative person even, they just mean that suddenly you are suffering from obsessive thoughts. We’d highly advise you seek help over this, it responds to treatment. You’d be surprised just how many people live with it. The main treatment is cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT). https://www.harleytherapy.co.uk/obsessive-compulsive-disorder-counselling-london-ocd.htm
Hey I have been scared of going to sleep. Because I feel like something bad will happen when i am asleep I have ADHD and I have medicine to help me but we kind of have figured out if I don’t take it gets worse and I wonder if I am not getting enough sleep I go to bed at 11 and most of the time wake up at 7 I used to wake up a 9 but I cant any more because after 7 my body wont let me sleep any more. another thing is that I don’t like eating most I will go a whole day not eating in one week. when I force my self to eat I feel like I will throw it all up. I have been told by many people that I have anxiety but I don’t know.
Please help me and give me a very honest answer.
Hi Case, we can’t give any diagnosis over a chat and based on a comment as we would need to know you properly and your entire situation. But our red flag is around the fact that you are taking medication. Did the doctor not talk to you about side effects? Medicine for ADHD is a stimulant, so it’s not unusual to then sleep less and have a smaller appetite. Your doctor legally should have explained all this to you when prescribing. If they didn’t, you need to call them and talk things through. He or she needs to know you have anxiety which could also be connected. They might need to alter your dose. Best, HT.
For a while now I have to do certain things otherwise something bad will happen to the people I care about. For example, I have to touch a cup with my right hand, then left hand and then both my hands. I obviously know that not doing this will mean something terrible will happen to my family, but I do it anyway. It’s gotten to the point where any time I have to leave my house I get really anxious and stressed because I know i’m going to have to do lots of rituals because if I don’t I think something will happen to my house, like it will burn down. Sometimes it’ll be “if you don’t do that your mum will die, but if you do it then your dad will die”. It makes it really hard to do even simple every day activities like brushing my hair, showering etc. I have to do the things otherwise I get really anxious. I’m worried that it’s going to get worse.
Hi Hannah, sounds like it could be obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). Could you talk to your doctor about this? It’s interesting you have used the word ‘rituals’, perhaps you have already done some research about OCD? Even if it’s just anxiety, if it’s affecting your life to this extent important to seek help. Best, HT.
So for a long time now (a couple of years) i have had this thought process (i don’t know how to describe it) and basically i could be doing something random, wether that be hanging out with a friend, showering, etc and all of the sudden if feel as if I don’t do something specific something bad will happen (ex. If i don’t tap the couch 12 times my dad will get into a car accident) and these thoughts have become very frequent recently. I technically know that even if i don’t do what my brain is telling me to do in that moment nothing bad will really happen but, when the thought first appears it feels completely real. Also, i have been kind of paranoid lately, but usually it’s of things that wouldn’t even make sense (ex. When i spent the night at my grandmothers and for no reason at all i thought that she was gonna go crazy and chase me around) and i don’t know what to do about this. I would talk to my parents about this but i don’t wanna burden them since my family has been going through a lot recently. Do you have any ideas why i may be having these thoughts/thinking about these things?
Hi there becca, we recommend that you look up OCD, obsessive compulsive disorder. This sounds a classic case. We’d then suggest you really do need to talk to someone about it. Don’t see it as being a burden! It’s brave to ask for help and you aren’t being a burden, people who love you want you to be okay. We have an article on asking your parents to help you with mental health here http://bit.ly/talktoparents. Best, HT.
It’s a year plus now that have been suffering from heaviness of head. When I was writing my final exam at school. I was scared and my brain started getting hot. I had to finish my exam.. I was really tensed.. I think this happens anything I think of it…
It has not yet stopped till now…
2months ago, my friends were discussing of signs and symptoms of how an ulcer patient.. before I know it.. my chest started getting heavy and I find it difficult to breathe in properly… And if I don’t eat up on time ever since then I feel this thing… I’m really suck
Hi there Ojo, we recommend you see a medical doctor for a full check up. It’s important to take your health seriously and rule out a physical cause. Then, if they don’t find anything, you might want to use the search bar read our articles about anxiety, which it sounds like you are suffering from. Best, HT.
So much bad have happened in my life (more bad than good, but that doesn’t say much, considering how little good have happened). I’m just waiting for the next time.
And regarding sleeping disorders; some people can’t sleep because of all the terrible thoughts in their head. For me it’s the other way around; if I can’t sleep, all the bad thoughts gradually find their way in.
Sometimes when I’m in between sleep and wakefulness, I wake up full of fear because of the pure clarity I can see my life with. And it’s always the same; the passing of time. I’m getting older and older, but only on the outside. Inside, and in my life, nothing is happening. When the clarity occurs, it can be about my grandmother, who is the only living grandparent I have left, and realize she can’t have many years left. And I realize how old I’m becoming myself, and how old my parents have become.
(Also when I dream about my family, all family members usually look the way they look when I was in my late teens or early 20s. And we are all living in the same house (and my brother who took his own life is still alive), for good and worse.)
Hi Hansen, sounds tough. There are obviously many things going on here. For example, we aren’t sure why you are still living at home with your family as it seems you are an adult, is it economic reasons, are you unemployed? As adults we need to be independent to understand who we are and what we want. It’s clear you are depressed and have anxiety and feel stuck. We’d highly advise reaching out for support. If you are in the UK, you can talk to your GP for a referral for free counselling. If not, and you don’t have money, we have an article on ideas for finding free to low cost counselling here http://bit.ly/lowcosttherapy Best, HT.
I don’t know what my problem is. I’ve had so many bad experiences in my life. I’m 69 now and when I was 24 I was in a house fire. I almost died. My life after that when something happens to someone I love it’s going to be bad. The last two years have made it so much worse. I lost mi fiancé two years ago and this last October I lost my baby brother. My granddaughter had to take my great granddaughter to the er because she wasn’t feeling well. My mind was convinced something horrible was wrong:(. I just don’t know what to do, thank you
Hi Sheila, first of all, there is nothing ‘wrong’ with you. It sounds to us, although we can’t obviously give a diagnosis based on a comment, that you are suffering from anxiety or even PTSD. A trauma like almost dying in a fire can do things to our brain. Our brain is designed to protect us. Unfortunately this can mean that our brain, from the trauma onwards, overreacts. In trying to protect us from further danger, we can spend our lives always on edge and anxious. There is short term therapy called EMDR, eye movement desensitisation and reprogramming therapy, that is specifically designed to help stop this overreactive brain response and to help people who had a marked trauma. It can be remarkably effective, and you don’t have to endlessly talk about the past. You might want to look into it. Best, HT.
I am only 13 years old and was in a brutal car accident months ago and now everynight I am in bed I just had a feeling that someone was going to walk through the door of our house and kill us. Also before the accident I actually liked riding in vehicles and thought it was pretty fun but since then I can not stay in a car and am constantly fearing that we will crash again and my heart will just start racing. My parents just today left on a 4 day trip just the 2 of them and ever since they left I have been telling myself that they are going to die but I know that it is very unlikely that it will happen because my dad is a very good driver and has maneuvered right out of car accidents before.
Jacob, this is a normal response to a traumatic experience, so first of all, don’t feel there is something wrong with you. Scary experiences do things to our brain. Your brain is in a sort of shock, meaning it is trapped in the fight/flight/or freeze response, the stress response our body goes into when it is under strain that means we are anxious and edgy. And if it doesn’t start to shift in a few more weeks it’s also possible it’s post-traumatic shock syndrome, PTSD. Here’s an article on the differences https://www.harleytherapy.co.uk/counselling/acute-stress-disorder-vs-ptsd.htm. Can you talk to your parents about this? Or a counsellor at school, or an adult you trust? Is it possible, if you continue to feel the same or worse, you might ask your parents if you could see a counsellor? We have a guide here to talking to your parents about mental health http://bit.ly/talktoparents Best, HT.
I always feel fear and anxious about my job performing.But in reality there is no difficulty in job and no problem .But always these thoughts automatically come in my mind and can’t leave me for the last 6 years plz help me
Hi Mohammed, anxiety is not logical. It involves non logical thoughts that race through our mind and make day to day life stressful. If you can afford to see a counsellor who could help you with anxiety, that is helpful. But there are also techniques you can do by yourself that help like mindfulness meditation we have a free guide here http://bit.ly/mindfulnessallabout. Otherwise we would ask, do you like your job? Not is it difficult, is it deep down what you want to do? Sometimes if we are going in a life direction we don’t actually deep down want we can feel more and more anxious and blame it on other things. Best, HT.
Since i was little i have always had bad thoughts in my head mainly at night like i imagine ways my family and friends are dying and i just want them to go away. When i was 17 i was on fire i felt fine after it until i had children i have to sleep in the same room as them as almost everynight i imagine how my house sets on fire and how i can escape bymyself with 2 small children and its draining me constant thoughts of everyone close to me dying 😪
Hi Julia, it sounds like what you really want is freedom, not for everyone close to you to die. And wanting to be free to be who we are if we are in a family situation where we have to fit a set of rules or ways of being that were chosen for us is very understandable. We don’t know what country you are in or what options you have. Is there someone you trust who you can talk to about this who would understand how trapped you feel? Without knowing your country we don’t know your options, if you can access some sort of support to find your way forward. If you are in a Western or European country there are many options, but we aren’t sure if this applies. Finally, the one place nobody can control is your mind. Only you control that. So you can also use your mind as a positive escape, not just a negative one, to imagine wonderful things that could happen, or create worlds and dreams that leave you feeling good instead of worse that a difficult situation is already leaving you. Best, HT.
i have seen parents separating and my maternal uncles interfering in our life.when i got married i got trechorous husband who cheated and have a daughter.i am now separate.my brother is als not supportive.i hate men .noone is supportive.i feel melancholic.i need power so that people are afraid of me and dont talk behind my back
Hi Jasmine, sounds hard. We aren’t sure what country you are in. And what kind of power is available, if you have the chance to find a job, for example, and can have the income to go live by yourself. The only thing is we can’t control other people, ever. If people want to talk, they will talk. The only thing we have control over, ever, in life, is ourselves. We can learn to control how other people effect us or don’t effect us. At the end of the day if we care what others think, even family, we can spend our entire lives feeling tortured. It is possible to raise our self-esteem and our own feeling of identity that we don’t really care so much what others think as the person whose opinion matters is our own. The greatest power we can have is to know ourselves and have the power to control our reactions to the world around us and to control our own perspective which has the power to change our moods https://bit.ly/perspectiveHT. Counselling would be very helpful but if that is not an option things like mindfulness can help us learn who we are outside of our panicked thoughts and anger, you can learn for free here. http://bit.ly/mindfulnessallabout We wish you courage. HT
Hi
The pandemic has increased my anxious thoughts, but whenever something happens, like someone gets a cough, I immediately panic that it is covid. Also, the other day, my sister wasn’t answering her phone and I thought she’d been kidnapped. And just today, someone screamed and I thought there was someone bad on campus. I try to think about these things rationally first, but then I get overwhelmed with bad outcomes. I always assume the worst will happen whenever we drive up or down a mountain and I can’t seem to shake it. It makes me sick to my stomach with anxiety.
Hi Lex, you’ve nailed it with the last word – anxiety. Obviously this is not a diagnosis, we don’t know you, but these are classic anxiety like thoughts. We’d highly recommend you go use your campus’ mental health team and talk to them about this and see what they have to say and what help they can offer. Best, HT.
I overreact a lot and always on edge…I scream at my children over trivial thongs then I apologize ..I just realize I hate noise and I am an overthinker.i am very good at reading people.but I’m very friendly..so impatient.please what do I do
Hello, found this article to help a bit on what I’m currently going through right now.
Woke up from sleep because I thought my curtains were someone giving over me (almost like being called to die). Now I am so scared that something really bad is going to happen. I went to the bathroom after and convinced myself that there was someone waiting for me outside my bathroom and stayed in there for half an hour after constantly telling myself that I was going to fight this person off. I don’t want to go out at all now because I’m afraid of what might happen.
Life is okay right now and I keep looking for something bad to happen because it has been a while since anything bad has happened. I am tired of thinking like this because it stops me from doing a lot.
Thank you.
Hi, I am really stuck at my life. Things have been going wrong for years now. But this is not even the worst patt. Worst part whenever something is bad about to happen, or something us not going to workout for me, or even when my prayer is not going to get answered, i will have my body parts tell me that this is not gonna work out. Like my left ear will be like warm, sweltering. There is this sensation that somebody is cutting off my finger and same kind of sensation in my toe. This body part energy is crippling for me. I dont know what it is. But it us always always true. No matter what my body always wins. Because of this i know things before hand. I’m psychic and intutive. But this is driving me crazy. I am about to make a really good effort for something but these will already tell me its not worth it. What is it please tell me.
I fear something bad will happen to me in terms of physical. It’s so bad and in every area. I have a counselor but she is moving away. It’s helped me to challenege thoughts and go thru rational thinking. Is something really a threat or no. But this doesn’t always help, I try to eliminate all risks before doing something. I had a mom always saying how things would bring harm, her fear was excessive and I became this person as an adult. Plus I was sexually abused. By a few people. So these 2 combined are rough. I don’t know what else to do to break thru where fear is no longer part of my thinking. I pray a lot and ask God to free always. I have hope.
So everything is fine in my relationship even i am engage to marry my partner whom i love very much but since few days i can’t shake this feeling of something bad is happening to my partner or he may die .. it race my heartbeat and after thaf i felt tremendous guilt and vomit like .
Is it normal to think about this
I’m always scared of something thing bad or accident will happen to my child.when he not in home or going out with someone else I’m feeling very scared.
I always feel something bad is going to happen… Negative thoughts always come into my mind… I m very worried.. I always think someone will die . I m always worried for other people I don’t know why? Other people always come into my mind.. I get very easily get effected by other people ….. Plz reply…
im going to give a quick background check on myself:
my sister has schizophrenia and bpd, my mother has schizophrenia and bpd (i believe?) the only thing im sure of is my sister.
since i was little, ive always hated violence or seeing people sad because i often empathize with people, but recently its gotten much much worse. throughout my life ive used my ‘gut feeling’ to guide me (ie. some sort of feeling in my lower stomach or lack thereof often predicts or decides my life choices) and recently ive been unable to differenciate this gut feeling and my fear of being hurt
like sometimes ill randomly get this thought that somebody is going to hurt me, i dont know who, and i dont know when, but i just feel it coming and i dont know whether its my gut feeling or the fear of it actually happening, and it turns way worse because im left thinking that my gut is telling me that somebody is going to hurt me.
its gotten worse recently, maybe because of my lack of sleep but its been really, REALLY bad. sometimes i even imagine killing myself to avoid the ‘eventual’ moment that someone is going to hurt me. even as i type this im imagining that somebody is going to read this and hurt me for it, everything i do in private is also dictated by this fear and i act accordingly to whatever i think this ‘person’ might like or not like, i dont even feel safe putting in both my earbuds to listen to music, i booby trap my room and ive tried getting a lock but i cant convince my dad without sounding absolutely insane.
im going to give a quick background check on myself: my sister has schizophrenia and bpd, my mother has schizophrenia and bpd (i believe?) the only thing im sure of is my sister. since i was little, ive always hated violence or seeing people sad because i often empathize with people, but recently its gotten much much worse. throughout my life ive used my ‘gut feeling’ to guide me (ie. some sort of feeling in my lower stomach or lack thereof often predicts or decides my life choices) and recently ive been unable to differenciate this gut feeling and my fear of being hurt like sometimes ill randomly get this thought that somebody is going to hurt me, i dont know who, and i dont know when, but i just feel it coming and i dont know whether its my gut feeling or the fear of it actually happening, and it turns way worse because im left thinking that my gut is telling me that somebody is going to hurt me. its gotten worse recently, maybe because of my lack of sleep but its been really, REALLY bad. sometimes i even imagine killing myself to avoid the ‘eventual’ moment that someone is going to hurt me. even as i type this im imagining that somebody is going to read this and hurt me for it, everything i do in private is also dictated by this fear and i act accordingly to whatever i think this ‘person’ might like or not like, i dont even feel safe putting in both my earbuds to listen to music, i booby trap my room and ive tried getting a lock but i cant convince my dad without sounding absolutely insane.
I am constantly battling with irrational thoughts and fears and ask for constant reassurance from friends/family . I am always googling symptoms and convince myself I have the worst illness. If my grown up children do not answer their phones first time I ring and text continuously until I get a response or I message their friends without thinking rational thoughts like they could be at work or not hear the phone.. it gets to the point I cry and become physically sick. I don’t know how to stop it